Nighttime Listmaking

2 01 2009
No but really.

No but really.

Sometimes, despite my best efforts, I find myself totally and completely unable to fall asleep. Despite how long my day has been, or how exhausted I may be, I end up lying in bed, compiling lists in my head to the tune of Bryan’s (and Lucy’s) snores. One might blame the mattress, or seasonal Ho Ho Ho stress levels, or even my overblown caffeine addiction (pffft), but I think, in my case, it’s much simpler than that. I just can’t turn off my brain. I’ve tried all the usual solutions; Sleepytime (TM) tea, warm baths just before bed, smoking half a joint, the arm-twisting of The Man-Type for a much appreciated back massage, etc. The only thing that works for me, without fail, is reading in bed. But even this comes with a catch: once I start reading, I might not be able to stop. If I’m especially tired, my eyes start to get tired and droopy after a chapter or two, but if the book is magnificent (like oh so many are), I’ll read and read and read and suddenly realize that its 3AM. By that time, of course, its too late; I’m far too enthralled by the trials and tribulations of the book’s characters that I FORCE myself to stay awake longer, to find out what happens next.

Reading is my anti-sleep.

When I was in highschool, I went through a mild bout with insomnia, and I was lucky enough to have a computer and fellow insomniac friends to talk to late at night. Maybe my mild insomnia had something to do with me going to film school… when I couldn’t sleep and didn’t feel like reading, I’d watch a movie until I crashed, or it ended, whichever happened first. I must have watched hundreds of movies, spanning all genres, which must have triggered something in my overtired brain, something along the lines of “Hey, I think I could do that… I could totally make movies. I like watching them, so, damn, why not?” Most of my graduating class had different, more ambitious reasons for going to film school. Some scrimped and saved for years, and were put on waiting lists, and moved across the country to live in Thunder Bay of all places, just so they could enroll in Confederation College’s renowned Film Production program. And me? I just couldn’t sleep.

I’ve always been a night person more than a morning person. I can do the early morning thing if its absolutely necessary, but only if I have a significant amount of coffee buzzing through my veins. But without coffee? Fugetabbboutit. With the exception of my first week in Winnipeg, when Bryan and I went to bed before 10 every night out of sheer exhaustion, I’ve always stayed up late. I just don’t need much sleep to function, I guess. As well as being a night owl, I’ve always been a night writer. I blog or make lists of things to do/buy/remember, or write emails or letters, even the occasional journal entry (yes in a REAL notebook. How retro.) Something about putting pen to paper, or fingers to keyboard, empties my head and makes it possible for me to manufacture the Z’s.

And now that we have a Christmas Wireless Router (thanks Greg), I can do my nighttime listmaking anywhere I damned well please. Sitting on the kitchen counter with my feet in the sink, for example. Why? Because I can, and because its just weird enough to be comfortable.